FREE download for the holidays if you’re out of money – give freely

 Better Endings New Beginnings Offers The Whitest Wall by Jodee Kulp

FREE FOR CHRISTMAS 

Regular $9.99 on Kindle

Looking for a gift and no money left…FREE kindle download from Dec 22-26

“Winner 2012 USA Books Award” Best Young Adult Fiction
“Winner Mom’s Choice Gold Award” Best Young Adult Fiction
“Winner Mom’s Choice Gold Award” Best Adult Fiction

“This book should be read if every high school classroom in America!”

In a season of hurting, understanding differences in each other may be the bridge of healing and stopping future violence.

BOOK REVIEW
“Kulp has created a new third-person Catcher in the Rye”
– Lyelle Palmer, Ph.D., Special Education Professor Emeritus, Winona State University, Minnesota.

“Jodee Kulp’s beautifully drawn characters will touch your heart, mind and soul.”
– bestselling author, Diane Chamberlain, Before The Storm

The Whitest Wall has the ability to change the perception of how we view others, treat others and understand others. Learning how to deal with
brain injuries, neurodevelopmental therapies and living with a neurologic brain condition, is life threatening for many. Without the proper support, understanding or human connection, these injured beings fall from everyday life. Sometimes these injuries are not always heard or seen and people live in a silent world of pain. Kulp’s novel, “The Whitest Wall”, opens the door to the silence and screams to promote insight.

Kulp writes her novel with a sensitivity that speaks to her personal experiences with Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorders (FASDs). She moves her characters freely and easily through her story giving them color and value so that readers are able to connect with them. This connection is what she uses as her learning tool. Her boomerang effect is that she teaches others about the nature of living with FASDs—she educates her readers on living with a neurological brain disorder.

“The Whitest Wall”, is meant to inspire conversation about FASDs. It is a novel that uses fiction as a vehicle for public education. Kulp interweaves her characters, she builds upon truth, sprinkles on fright and reality for flavor and delivers a fascinating story that will touch the hearts of everyone that reads “The Whitest Wall”.

— Sara Hassler, Midwest Book Review

#6 Days to FASDay – I have a dream. . . .



I have a dream….


That one day little children will not be born with brain damage because of the alcohol they were fed before they were even borm.

I have a dream. . .

That one day persons with inivisible disabilities will not be treated second-class citizens, but will be able to participate in their local communities accepted in their differences

I have a dream. . .

That one day predators and persecutors will not addionally victimize persons with fetal alcohol. That people will realize it is no joke. That the day – to – day struggle is real and cannot be kissed away, or bandaged or ignored.

I have a dream . . .

That one day we will see all people as mattering.

As my young adult daughter says so profoundly, “You can’t be handicapped if you are born like that. You just are.”

#9 Days To FASDay – Speak Out on Fetal Alcohol

Prepare to give a speech

This is the first time Liz and I stepped out years ago at the 1st International FASDay –

You can do it too!

Here is my speech – feel free to use mine and adapt to your community.

Today is a day… International FAS Awareness Day — 9.9.99 @ 9:09
Jodee Kulp, Parent Keynote, Federal Courthouse Plaza, 12:30 pm — Minneapolis, Minnesota

Thank you for being part of International FAS Awareness Day 9 9 99.
The Bells have rung out in Minnesota and are continuing their journey around the globe. We were the 18th time zone in the International Bell Concordance and didn’t they sound beautiful! Thank you to the citizens of Minnesota and all those involved with prenatal exposure for the mighty effort they put out to make this day happen.

It is my privilege to speak on behalf of all the parents who love and live with children exposed to alcohol before birth. It is my privilege to speak for those who live daily with the primary and secondary issues erupting from this exposure.

Today is a day of awareness.
We have stripped back the dark covering and let the sun shine in. We have come together as a world family, united in the cause of making a difference and hope this first “One Magic Moment” will begin to change lives.

Today is a day of awareness.
Alcohol is devastating, and most devastating to the weakest and most vulnerable in our society — the unborn child. Alcohol exposure is the leading known cause of mental retardation in the western world – US, Canada, Europe and Australia.

In the United States 10,657 babies are born daily (1999 US numbers are listed below)

  • . . . 3 will have Muscular Dystrophy
  • . . . 4 will have Cystic Fibrosis
  • . . . 4 will have Spina Bifida
  • . . . 4 will be infected with HIV
  • . . . 10 of these babies will have Downs Syndrome.

Researcher and fund-raisers are working for these children.

But — are you ready for the figures —

  • . . . 20 babies will be born with FAS
  • . . . these children will have visible facial and other physical deformities
  • . . . they are the lucky ones

People will see with the eyes, understand and help will be provided. These physical manifestations are not caused by MORE drinking but simply because of the day in gestation the pregnant mother chose to drink.

Today is a day of awareness.
NOW — are you really ready for the tough issue

  • . . . 100 babies will be born with Fetal Alcohol Effects
  • . . . these children’s deformities will be hidden within their bodies, in their brains and organs.
  • Most will go undiagnosed.
  • Most will live a life with little help with behaviors misjudged and struggling with learning and emotional issues.

Today is a day of knowledge.
Brain damage is non-reversible and a permanent condition that an individual must live with for the rest of their life. The person with prenatal alcohol exposure does not have the choice of NOT being impaired, yet has the responsibility of learning to live and to fit into a society that neither tolerates nor understands their impulsive behaviors.

Today is a day of knowledge.
Any one of us could become the parent of a prenatally exposed infant. FAS is no respector of persons or culture. It crosses economic and racial lines. The results of a very recent survey of over 100,000 women discovered that women in households of greater than $50,000 income, women who are college educated, unmarried women and female students have a higher than average incidence of drinking during pregnancy. I ask that no fingers be pointed at any person for this affliction. I ask for forgiveness from the past. I ask for a resolution of personal responsibility from this day forward for even one child to be saved.

Today is a day of knowledge.
A can of beer, a glass of wine, a shot of liquor and a wine cooler all contain about 1/2 oz. of absolute alcohol. If a woman consumes 2 drinks in one hour, her baby could have a blood alcohol content higher than the mother could. FAS is 100% preventable. If a woman becomes pregnant, she shouldn’t drink. It’s that simple. There is no known safe amount of alcohol for a pregnant woman. When a woman drinks, her baby drinks, because alcohol passes directly through the placenta to the baby.

Today is a day of hope.
When we join together we can achieve a better tomorrow. The knowledge each of us holds can provide the tiny pieces of a large puzzle to help contribute to the success and happiness of those afflicted. Together we can provide knowledge, wisdom, support and encouragement to women who are planning to conceive, pregnant or breastfeeding a child. This we can all do with love.

Today is a day of hope.
Solutions require us to work together. Doctors, researchers and nutritionists around the world can share their discoveries and treatments that are already making a difference. Mental health professionals, educators and parents can join as a team to reach, teach and train these young people, sharing ideas from around the globe.

Today is a day of hope.
We must open our eyes and our ears. We must shift our focus and understand the inner world of living with prenatal exposure. We must begin to see these children differently, and begin to build the bridge of understanding. Diane Malbin a tireless advocate provides the clues by changing from:

  • “Won’t to can’t”
  • “Bad to frustrated”
  • “Lazy to tries hard”
  • “Refuses to sit still to overstimulated”
  • ‘”Fussy and demanding to oversensitive”
  • “Trying to make me mad to can’t remember”
  • “Resisting to doesn’t get it”
  • “Doesn’t try to tired of failing.”
  • “Doesn’t get the obvious to needs many reteachings.”

Yes it is hard to be the parent of an FAS child.
Yes it is hard to be the teacher of an FAS child.
But have you tried to be the FAS child!

Our adopted daughter Liz exhibits Fetal Alcohol Effects. Our family has grown deeply because of it. The primary issues of hypersensitivity, overstimulation, night terrors and learning disabilities have challenged us.
We have struggled with impulsivity, low self-esteem, anger and frustration.
We are determined to prevent the secondary issues from occurring – violence, suicide, alcohol abuse, poverty, homelessness, delinquency, incarceration, and early pregnancy.
We have discovered that proper nutrition, added nutrients and sleep make an incredible difference and allow Liz to function very well.
We have discovered she is happiest when provided clear boundaries and concrete communication.
We have discovered her learning styles and teach everything in multiple modalities….see it, hear it, do it. With a strong emphasis on doing it.

I am proud Liz is my daughter and she is doing wonderfully. This growth did not come easily for her. She is a fighter and has climbed many mountains. In a quiet one-on-one teaching arrangement she has been able to gain 5 years in reading, 7 years in spelling and is currently at age level in mathematics. Learning any new material has been very difficult for her. We have been building one very tiny step at a time, without moving on until mastery has taken place and then often reteaching areas a number of times.
Though her brain still works compartmentally we are beginning to see transfer of some information and together we are learning how to teach and how to learn. She and I are on the same team. By “compartmentally” I mean, for example, that when are doing spelling she can spell at the 9th grade level and when we are learning to write she can spell at the 6th grade level. The transfer of information is very difficult for her.
Two weeks ago, my daughter Liz and I bought a peck of cucumbers to make into pickles. Our science classes are very hands on and we were going to study sterilization and Louis Pasteur. We washed and carefully brushed each cucumber so they were perfectly clean – they were beautiful. Then we soaked the cucumbers overnight in a 5% salt solution. In the morning the cucumbers looked the same, but no longer tasted the same. We cut up garlic and dill and red peppers, and boiled vinegar, salt and water with pickling spices. We packed sterilized jars tightly with our beautiful bright green cucumbers and poured on the brine. Then we sealed the jars and boiled them 20 minutes in a hot water bath. When we lifted the jars out of the water a dull green pickle had replaced the bright green cucumbers…
And I thought THIS IS WHAT we have done to these children.

Today is a day of advancement. Growing up with FAS is a community process and it takes a united community to raise these children. It took one dream and two people to create the vision for today — Bonnie Buxton and Teressa Kellerman.
They believed:
‘The oscillation of butterfly wings in Brazil may set off storms in Texas.’
And what a storm they set off. They mobilized and motivated individuals from around the globe. From New Zealand to Alaska people have united. The Internet has connected a previously silent world of creative, intelligent and hardworking individuals willing to lay down differences for a common cause of helping children and adults living with FAS
Where do we go from here?…
These children are teachable, lovable, creative and energetic but they do not learn like other children. They need to be taught things other children just seem to simply know. We need to discover the resources already available and we have powerful resources in our backyards — birth parents, adoptive parents and foster parents who are living, loving and growing together 24 hours a day with prenatal exposure. These families have been creative in developing processes that work to help their children succeed and find happiness in a world they struggle in.

I challenge each of you to make a difference.

  • Tell people this is an important issue.
  • Join with NOFAS www.nofas.org and share ideas and information.
  • Visit our website at http://www.betterendings.org/
  • Email your successful ideas to us. We will publish them.
  • Encourage women to remain alcohol and drug free during pregnancy.
  • Write to your congressman, senators, schools, community leaders and medical professionals and let them know “We’re Tired of Our Children Being Pickled.”

Today is the day to make a difference.
My words on this 1st hopefully of many future International FASDays are dedicated to my wonderful Liz. May we begin this difference in changing this world for others together.

Speak Out in Your Community and open the minds of others to Help Raise the Standard to Build Better Baby Brains
Join the International Virtual Million Mind March

If we want to create an “REAL” Economic Stimulus Package – now is the time to begin promoting “Building Better Baby Brains” by Raising the Standard for the Future – Alcohol and Babies don’t mix and add to the future cost of education, medical, community and judicial services.
  • Join our virtual Million Mind March to give One Million Babies in the next year the opportunity to develop healthy minds
Participate in a Local Radio Show and Get Your Events Talked About
Call your local radio show and see if you can get on a program to talk about FASD during the next 60 days. You may just open up some minds and save a few baby brain cells.
Visit:
Step out, speak out, get out and make some friendly noise to build awareness of FASD – fetal alcohol spectrum disorders.
Tomorrow I will share the first speech I fearfully spoke on 09.09.99 at the 1st Annual FASDay – sadly the same message still needs to be heard.
Enjoy coming up with GREAT ideas – we’d love to hear from you!

#10 Days To FASDay – Pass on a fall read

Pass on a fall read to a friend 

you’d like to learn more about 

fetal alcohol… 

Here are a couple curl up to read novels… reviews are appreciated by all authors

Click link above to read more or order books from Amazon

Reviews

The Whitest Wall by Jodee Kulp 

The Whitest Wall, a debut novel by Jodee Kulp is the winner of 2009 Best Adult Fiction and 2009 Best Young Adult Fiction by The Mom’s Choice Awards Foundation and a finalist for Book of the Year, Multicultural Fiction. The Whitest Wall has meets high school curriculum standards.

Jodee Kulp has created a new third person Catcher in the Rye
Kulp captures the chaotic turmoil of culturally-muddled miscommunication and FAS brain fog of lost-boy Kevin, a 21-year-old going-on-ten jailed for murder, seemingly by his own matter-of-fact confession. The Whitest Wall is a worthy read, a trip into a novel world, written with entertainment quality as vivid as a screenplay with a multitude of metaphors for interpretation and meaning. This tantalizing tale should engage youthful readers and provoke discussion among those of high-school age and older. Caulfield, move over, there is much more to tell!
— Dr. Lyelle Palmer

  • “What you don’t know won’t hurt you is a lie… Fiction, as C.S. Lewis would say, adds to reality, not just describes it. It enriches daily life and irrigates the deserts of our lives. Jodee Kulp is so adept at casting the players in The Whitest Wall and so passionate a story teller you will look at your neighbor through different eyes than ever before.”
    — Mac McConnell, author, “Forever Changed”, “Bozra””

    An inside view of FASD I am overcome with the manner in which Jodee was able to thread together racism, poverty, abuse, fetal alcohol, depression, and post traumatic stress disorder with smoothness that did not confuse the reader.”
    — Ruth A. Rice, FASD Program Director, White Earth

    “This is a must read book for everyone as it’s a topic that has been in the closet for too long. Jodee’s book will open everyone’s eyes that FASD is a very serious issue that we all need to become better educated about as well as develop services for those impacted by it. I can’t wait for Book 2.”
    — Glenys DiLissio Executive Director,

The high school version of The Whitest Wall just came to my office by UPS. A Gold Award winning novel by Mom’s Choice it meets high school curriculum standards in the following areas while building awareness of Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disoroders. Consider it for the high schools in your areas. Email jodeekulp@gmail.com if you are interested in getting this novel into your high school curriculum.
The Whitest Wall
NATIONAL CURRICULUM STANDARDS

ENGLISH STUDIES

  1. The Whitest Wall promotes an understanding of the diversity of the American English language in both a current and historic sense with the use of patterns and dialect.
  2. The reader will cross cultures, ethnic groups, geographic regions and social roles to acquire new information for a better response to the needs and demands of society and the workplace.
  3. The reader will draw on personal experience to reflect on the understanding of the other citizens. They will be challenged by portions of the texts with word meanings and misunderstandings. 
SOCIAL STUDIES

  1. Written for the development of a democratic citizenry to enable learners to engage in civic discourse and problem-solving, and to take informed civic action.
  2. The Whitest Wall can provide classroom discourse in the seven of ten theme areas:
    i) Culture
    ii) Time, continuity and change
    iii) People, places and environments
    iv) Individual development and identity
    v) Individuals, groups and institutions
    vi) Power, authority and governance
    vii) Global connections
    viii) Civic ideals and practice 
HEALTH STUDIES

  1. Students analyze the influence of culture, media, technology and other factors on health.
  2. Students demonstrate understanding of health-enhancing behaviors, reduce health risks, use decision-making skills to enhance health and advocate for personal, family and community health.
  3. The Whitest Wall provides for opens discussion in content areas addressed by the US Center of Disease Control
    i) behaviors that result in intentional or unintentional injury
    ii) alcohol and other drug use
    iii) sexual behaviors
    iv) prevention of fetal alcohol spectrum disorders

#53 Days To FASDay – Parent to parent support


Some of your ideas won’t work and that’s okay – you tried anyway!

In 2009,  Deb and Jodee tried a Family Support Show called

TOOLBOX PARENT RADIO to get the word out about living,

loving and laughing with atypical children and adults.

Since we didn’t have enough listeners – we got shut down, but not shut up!

Each week we hosted special guests that open our eyes to new ideas and provide us with new tools to help parents and professionals live, love and care about atypical children and intense adults. We worked really hard on the shows and actually did 16 of them!

Don’t worry if your idea doesn’t work like you planned. It’s okay to try again later or another way.
Families with atypical kids are busy – REALLY busy – and life can turn around and spin in a moment.

Visit our website at http://www.toolboxparent.com/ for FREE ARTICLES, forms and more to help families and professionals.

Online Manual – www.fasday.com
Seminar – Or try our easy, effective, exciting 1½ hour program that walks you
 through the morning of Sept.9: http://www.come-over.to/FASDAY/ABCDEFG/ 
(material from 2002 has excellent ideas)


Follow us through the next 60 days and plan your local or personal project to build awareness of fetal alcohol spectrum disorder – Each One Can Reach One!

Need family support visit www.toolboxparent.com
Need ideas for adults living with challenges of FASD visit www.braidedcord.net
Need information on fetal alcohol spectrum disorders visit www.betterendings.org
Interested in service dog for FASD visit www.thechancerchronicles.com

I have a dream. . . .

That one day little children will not be born with brain damage because of the alcohol they were fed before they were even borm.

I have a dream. . .
That one day persons with inivisible disabilities will not be treated second-class citizens, but will be able to participate in their local communities accepted in their differences

I have a dream. . .
That one day predators and persecutors will not additionally victimize persons with fetal alcohol. That people will realize it is no joke. That the day – to – day struggle is real and cannot be kissed away, or bandaged or ignored.

I have a dream . . .
That one day we will see all people as mattering.

As my young adult daughter says so profoundly, “You can’t be handicapped if you are born like that. You just are.”

Grandpa knows I’m a good girl

Grandpa died on Friday
And I really did my best
My mom left home without me
And my dad was put to the test
My father is a woodworker
Like my grandfather before
And my uncle asked my daddy
To make the box for grandpa to soar
And so I went to my friend’s house
And had a really good time
I missed the mortuary
So I wouldn’t stand in line
I called upon my mother
who was busy as can be
Writing up the remembrances
and an obituary
I asked her to please come home
And do my pretty hair
I wanted my sweet Grandpapa to
Really know I cared.
But she said I’m sorry darling
I can’t come home tonight.
I am sleeping with your Grandma
Go to bed, turn out the lights
I went downstairs the best I could
It was actually time for meds
I could feel my hands shaking
But decided not to go to bed
Instead I stayed up fixing
And fixing my pretty hair

And nothing seemed to be working
As I thought of grandpa
A way up there.
In a mighty fit of frustration
I pulled out and then redid
Only to see in the morning
There were bald spots on my head
I picked my clothes out carefully
Something grandpa would care
A bright red shirt and blue jeans
And barrettes for my hair
I worked til’ almost morning
The sun was about to rise
I took my medication and
Closed my pretty eyes

I didn’t hear the alarm clock
Dad jumped me out of bed
We’re leaving in five minutes
Was all I heard he said.
I grabbed the red shirt I’d chosen
I jumped into my jeans
This wasn’t how I wanted it
I hate being me.
I wanted to look pretty
I wanted to do my best
Instead I went overmedicated
And looked a sorry mess
The red shirt I was wearing
Looked like a club night
And the jeans I jumped into
Were not at all right.
The medication was humming
As we pulled quickly away
And I could tell inside myself
It was going to be a terrible day.
I did my best to be happy
I forgot my morning meds
I wanted to show everyone
How hard I’d worked to be
My very best.
We missed the visitation
We almost missed the church
I missed the long progression
That headed with the hearse
I missed the soldiers shooting
I missed putting grandpa in his grave
I finally understood this was not a very good way
I wanted to hold my mother
Who was busy for her dad
I wanted to hug my family
Who seemed sometimes happy sometimes sad
I didn’t eat a breakfast, and I forgot a snack
I even forgot the medication that I usually pack
I called my dad to say sorry
I tried really hard to be nice
But it got really obvious
People were looking at me twice.
My Auntie told be about the rose
Thar laid upon the stone
And I went to say goodbye to grandpa
When I was alone.
I looked upon each stone I saw
Holding eagles, plaques and pain
Not one stone held the rose
I felt I was insane
I went back home to tell them
That it was no longer there
My Auntie said go back again
And look down and stare
The rose will have grandpa’s name
I really know you care
I watched my feet a walking
And the rose still had it’s stick
But the stone they had told me to find
Was actually a brick.

She’s 22, I overhead
She’s able to behave
She’s doing drugs another said
My grandpa in the grave
I ran away to grandpa who was watching way up high
And I marched around the little town trying not to cry
Lost and scared and empty
My Auntie took me in
And we journeyed to the jail house
To prove I didn’t sin

I looked into the mirror
At my face when I can home
And I soon discovered I was not alone
My mother saw the bare spots that covered over my head
And I went into the bedroom to get my pretty shirt of red.
I held it up before her and I looked into her eyes
And we finally held each other
And she finally cried
And I told her that I loved her
And I said it was too bad
And I told her I love daddy
Who is my real dad
And I told her not to worry
Because I knew something true
That Grandpa saw me for who I was
And that she did too
She showed me the spent chamber they shot for grandpa today
Grandpa knows I’m a good girl, was all that I could say.

We learn from the people who walk before us. Are we brave enough to listen?